It's all happenings, vol 3

There's a temple just outside our little street, and yesterday during my 3 trips to the local hardware store (I had an idea that ultimately worked, but, man, that's too many god damned trips to one store) I noticed they were setting up for some kind of outdoor-food thing. So, later, Scout and I walked over to see what was what.

It's a Shinto temple and, y'know, I'm not, so I felt a little out of place - in addition to being, y'know, out of place generally. Are-we-supposed-to-be-here is a minor thing; surely someone will say something and we'll apologize and leave; no biggie. But there's the whole what-if-we're-not-wanted thing that I was worried about. So as we walked in I had a look on my face like 'Uhhhh... is this okay?' An elderly lady saw me and smiled, sort of welcoming us. It was comforting.

As we walked around the maybe-one-acre area some old dudes who had beer started saying beeru over and over - it took me a second to clock that they were doing a sort of we-have-beer-here-if-you-want-some universal light-hearted thing. That was also comforting, altho I thanked them and moved on. But then we saw the hot dogs and were all 'Damn!'. We bought 2. Jesus - they were good. Whole meat (pork I think) - as opposed to whatever's in American hotdogs. Amazing. I wanted to eat more, but I also didn't want to be the bloated American sitting on the ground in a temple with a pile of hot dogs in front of me. But christ they were good.

There's also this thing here called dorayaki. It's essentially 2 pancakes grown together with a filling of red-bean paste - a sort of sweet, but usually not sweet enough, filling popular as all hell here. (The Japanese don't appear to like sweets much. Their donuts and ice-cream and non-foreign dessert things are barely sweetened at all - which is sort of nice usually.) As we walked by the folks selling it (everything was about $1 each), they offered us some, saying 'puresento' - present. We took them and, after eating one (delish!), we tried to give them some money - they declined and we thanked them graciously. They were very kind. Then I had a wee bowl of grilled potato chunks that a lady started, and after a long, long time stopped, slathering butter on. Carbs and butter, as the Constitution informs, go amazingly together.

That was cool. We didn't stay long, but we had fun stopping by. Signs all over the neighbohood appear to say there will be another one (of whatever it was) on September 20th. (There's about a holiday a month here, but yesterday wasn't one.) I'll be stopping by with ¥100 coins at the ready....

It's all happenings, vol 2

Scout had her first classes today, starting a solid, 5-days-a-week semester that, fortunately, sees no class starting before noon*. We started the day by going to the bank to pay our rent because we couldn't figure out how to do it via the nearbyest ATM. Fortunately, the bank(er)s will run you thru the steps so you don't have to go in each month - and they don't have to help you. The ATMs have multi-lingual options (English and Portuguese are the two other languages I can remember, but there must be 5). We went back to the main branch of Bank of Tokyo Mitsubishi (MUFG - known to us as the mufugg'n bank), where we have our accounts, because of the American who works there and is helpful in such matters. She said the transfer option is only available in Japanese because they didn't want to have to translate every possible account the bank - or other, linked banks - holds. Makes sense. She ran us thru the steps and had the ATM(s - all of them) rememberize that info so it'll be easier to do next time - 5 steps or so, down from 10. Amazing.

1 of the steps we enjoyed quite a bit. Just before you pick the account into which you want to deposit money, in our case rental agency, (as there are no checks here, this is how it's done, mostly) you have to confirm that you've looked around and there are no creepy people nearby. The included creepy-person drawing - and I'll try to get a photo next time - looks like the Spy Vs Spy spies. Good times.

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Remember: old news.

It's all happenings, vol 1

As we’ve been without our own access to the Internets for the last ~five weeks (and will be for at least 2 more). I’ve been jotting my thinkings in long, tedious e-mails to my only father. For your edifijoyment, I’m going to post some of the choicer bits here, so if you’re my father, these are likely to seem familiar. If you’re not my father, keep in mind that these bits contain old information and should not to be confused with the information of now.

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We have to apply for our Registered Alien cards in order to do anything productive (get bank accounts, phones, intoneto, jobs, etc.) so this morning, we determined to get that done. After some strain we discovered the likely building was in Oji(-Ku), one stop away on the rail line we take everywhere.

The City building was on the opposite side of the Oji shrine, so we had to walk thru some of the shrine's grounds to get there. When it's entirely less humid, we'll go back and see the shrine itself, because it looked god damned gorgeous. The path we followed wound among deep green trees and alongside a (currently dry but for a trickle) creek bordered by rock and bamboo railings. Gorgeous. Alas, it was also horribly muggy in there. Like rain-forest muggy. We sped our stroll.

Before leaving home, I took photos of the Google Maps (we have no printer, so I used my camera's screen, you see) thinking the place would be difficult to find, but, upon exiting the station, we discovered signs pointing the way. Very good! Once at the building, Scout found an info lady who grabbed another lady and had her point us the way to where we would submit our card applications. That lady did so by walking us across the building, out the door, down the block into another building, then pointed to the window we needed to visit - and nearly walked us there, too. This has happened before, and kind of blows me away. The effort not just to be helpful, but to make sure the help actually accomplishes something, is mindblowing.

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Our applications filled and submitted (in 30 minutes or so), we asked where we apply for healthcare coverage - which is mandatory in Japan (as Obama claimed for the US, the individual mandate keeps the pool large enough that prices stay low here). 20 minutes later, tops, Scout and I had coverage. And still do. Insane.

I would think occasionally about not having health insurance, obviously, but I never obsessed about it. So I had no idea that finally getting health insurance would feel so emotional. It was a weird, elative moment that has led to much resultant calming. At worst now, should something happen, we can only go ~$7000 into debt. At worst. And it took 20 minutes.

For fuck's sake.

the first night

I was in the kitchen earlier today, warming up sweet and sour pork, while Jarrett attempted to make a phone call to his dad in the United States. After a couple attempts, he got through, and proceeded to have an internet conversation which was mostly fruitful, albeit punctuated with the minor hiccups of piggy-backing someone else's internet signal.

gomennasai, tonari

One of the topics of conversation was our individual daily alarm clocks. Personally, I find it hard to sleep after the local crow—which has the size and the requisite vocal power of a Buick—alights on my back porch and begins screaming. Jarrett, on the other hand, has a more developed capacity to sleep in the morning, and isn't waked until our neighbors drag out their futons and begin beating the ever-loving crap out of them each day.

However, we have been lazy Americans, and our futon has not seen much action. So to speak. We shake out the covers each day, and fold it into the closet, but that's all the maintenance we can muster.  It's been sixteen full days in country, and we have not yet hung the futon in the sun for all to see or beaten it like an adorable but disobedient child.

Ordinarily, I wouldn't give half a crap, but the futons of Japan are a far cry from the Western futons most Americans are accustomed to. To begin with, they are significantly thinner, which lends them the capacity to be quickly folded and stowed each day. However, our already flat bed grows flatter each night that we sleep on it, and if we would simply remember to hang it on the clothesline before going out one afternoon, we could return home to find it fluffy and warm, courtesy of Mr. Sun.

As I mostly eavesdropped on and occasionally participated in Jarrett and his dad's phone call, my mind wandered to our first night in the new apa—to, when we didn't even have a malnourished bed to forsake. It may be sixteen days since we've been in Tokyo, but it has only been fifteen days since we had a bed to call our own.

* * *

Arriving at the Higashi-jujo station, we followed our leasing agent's instructions to the new place with fairly acceptable precision. There was one small wrong turn just out of the train station, but we were quickly back on the right path.

The weather was startlingly hot. Coming first from cool Oregon, then secondly by way of an oddly cooler California, we were grossly unprepared for the high heat and even higher humidity of Tokyo in August. What's worse, we seemed to be hurrying for no good reason whatsoever, and were getting incrementally hotter as we traversed the local shopping arcade, then spirited down the side streets which led us to our new home.

Opening the front door, we were initially taken by how small 20 square meters really is, but quickly seized upon the sight of the air conditioner. Hallelujah! Shoes off, bags down, reach for the remote...which doesn't work. We were literally pouring sweat down our faces and necks and back, and now our hearts were broken: the apa—to had no power.

The power was supposed to have been turned on early that morning, but that clearly wasn't the case. The water ran, but it wouldn't warm, which meant ice cold showers if we intended to clean our salty selves. The lights wouldn't turn on, which meant only about two more hours of visibility for the night. Worse yet, the pretty little air conditioner hung their, taunting us, as the curtainless windows superheated our own tiny greenhouse.

Our only option was to relax briefly, catch our communal breaths, then wander outside, where it was about half a degree lower than indoors. As luck would have it, while waiting for Jarrett to re-shoe himself,  I leaned sleepily against the wall next to the front door, tilted back my head, and looked up at the power breaker.

The power breaker, of course, was covered in Japanese writing. However, there was one switch which was larger than the rest, and clearly displayed a red square. Uhhmmm. . . I pondered my options. What's the worst that could happen? Uhhmmm. . . I was crazy sleepy, and even crazier from the heat, so I risked possible explosion or Godzilla attack, stood on my toes, reached for the sky, and threw the switch.

Nothing happened.

Jarrett and I synchronously swiveled our heads toward the air conditioner, and saw the sweet glow of a tiny green light. We dashed to the remote, mashing buttons covered in kanji, until the thing kicked on, and a gentle breeze washed over our pathetic faces. We stood in its presence for about five minutes, then slowly began turning on and off lights. We had power, and we wouldn't die right away.

Deciding to let the apa—to cool down, we continued our plans for a tentative little walk around the neighborhood. We padded down the closest main road, noted the closest shops of interest to us, then reversed course when we felt like dehydrated fruit. On the way back, I noticed a home fashion store in the distance, and we made a mental note to check it out the next morning in our search for household goods.

We didn't know it yet, but that store in the distance would become our go-to store for nearly everything in our new home, and we would buy a futon there the very next day. We didn't know that we would jump excitedly when they gave us a Point Card the following week, or that everything was reasonably priced and conveniently located. All we knew was that Nitori looked promising, and we needed to get some sleep.

Back in our icy little apa—to, we pulled clothes from our suitcases, and lined the floor to make a nest. It had been a long, hard two days, and (though it was only about 8:00 PM) we had lasted as long as possible. We kept a clear path to the new bathroom, lied down on the hard floor, and fell promptly asleep.

I don't know how long it took Jarrett to wake up, but it took me about 20 minutes. The floors are carpeted, which is unusual in Japan, but the floors underneath that thin, thin carpet are hard, wood floors. My back ached and my hips hurt, and my neck was killing me. On top of everything, the air conditioner was freezing us out of house and home, but neither of us dared to turn it off.

We tossed and we turned all night, and neither of us seemed to be asleep at the same time. When first light broke, we were up and achy and ready to start the day. We had survived the very first night in our very first Japanese apartment, and we were much worse for the wear, but we had smiles on our faces and were ready to shake off the night.

* * *

what i like about you

One of the strangest things I encountered while preparing to move to Japan was the frequent quizzical looks, coupled with the question, “Why.”

I always answered the person honestly, though I did try to keep it light, because one thing you don’t want to discover before leaving a town is how your friend is actually a xenophobe. That’s just me, though. After an extraordinarily high number of political fights in my youth, I decided that sometimes it’s better not to know people too well. For the most part, people were simply curious, and wanted to know where the appeal was. However, I think I ended up more baffled than them.

I don’t think I’ve ever been called a free spirit or anything like that, but I do think of myself as relatively adventurous. I think this comes from moving around a lot as a kid, as well as the necessary exploration which comes with such frequent relocations. After I learned one route home from school, I’d go find another. When I finally got my own car, I frequently drove places, then circumnavigated my way home.

The first time I came to Japan, I was a bit afraid to try wandering off. After a few jet-lagged days of waking up too early for the rest of the world, I realized the same rules applied here as anywhere else: use common sense, and remember landmarks. If all else failed, I could simply retrace my steps.

All else does fail a lot in Japan. Most streets aren’t even named, let alone marked, and the number of alleyways a person could disappear down while wandering in circles seems innumerable. Recognizing funny little things—like the small door which leads down my alley or the back of a dilapidated wooden house I took a shine to—keeps me comfortable in a town where I may possess the language skills to ask for directions, but not the ones needed to understand the response. Also, if all all all else fails, I know how to write my address on a piece of paper, and hand it to a cab driver. Takushi!

None of this goes very far in answering the question of why I moved to Japan. The simplest answer I have is the one I frequently gave when I was asked the question to begin with: I love it here. I’m pretty sure that if they wanted, Japan could mount a campaign against Disneyland, and sue them for the rights to The Happiest Place on Earth. There are probably two or three things which will irritate the crap out of me by the time I graduate in a few years, but I don’t see them just yet, and they will almost certainly be overwhelmed by the things I do love.

More specifically, it seems to me as if Japan has been honing its culture for thousands of years to appeal to me directly. Every day, I see something which delights me, and makes me smile quietly to myself on the train, forgetting momentarily how tired I am, and how much my feets hurt. Here is where I elaborate:

The Food: I love Japanese curry. It’s my go-to sick food over chicken noodle soup. I love barbecued meats. I love rice. Maybe because I was raised in a house with a Japanese dad, and we had rice for dinner every night. Or maybe just because it’s starch-a-licious. All the same, Tokyo may be one of the most expensive cities in the world, but so long as you like rice, you’ll be okay. I’m not completely on board with the whole fish thing, but I am currently trying to think of Japan as a gently suggestive parent, who wants me to eat better and spend less time at Mister Donut. I have been trying to eat one thing each day which I have never had before, and it’s working out surprisingly well.

The Food, Pt. 2: the French may have the market cornered on desserts and pastries, but the Japanese have their number. Once the Japanese set their sights on something, they work at it until it’s just right. And they have been working on desserts for a long time. Bakeries are everywhere...on the street corners, in the department stores, at the train station. There are few places in Japan you couldn’t stretch out your arm and get a loaf of freshly baked bread or a croissant or tart or cake or custard. The custards are my achilles heel. Creme brulee, creme caramel, panna cotta, you name it, they have it. The 7-Eleven down the street from my apa—to has at least a dozen varieties, most for less than a dollar, each as good as anything you’d find in a nice restaurant.

The People: I’ll be honest: I haven’t traveled a whole lot. However, I feel comfortable saying that the Japanese people are the nicest I’ve ever met. And I’ve been to Canada! This past week has been an absolute swirl of first year Japanese, dictionaries, iPod apps, and a dizzying array of office workers, counter clerks, and train station attendants going above and beyond the call of duty to help out the ugly Americans. I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to my Japanese teacher, who insisted the little I knew would go a long way, and who was completely right.

Most notably, eigo o hanashimasu ka (do you speak English?) has only amounted to a small number of shaking heads. About half the time, the ask-ee will make the universal sign for very little then either try their best, or begin speaking better English than most people I have encountered in my life. The other half of the time, the person I am speaking with will disappear with a quick little chotto matte kudasai, then return with the youngest employee on staff, hoping they remember their English lessons from senior high school. All in all, the husband and I have had great luck, and the enthusiastic nature of the people here creates an enthusiastic spark in us as well. Kindness really is a cyclical force.

The Cars: they’re like little Matchbox versions of giant American cars! My current favorites are the mini mini vans, but a close second is the teeny tiny delivery trucks. Also, the license plates are way cool; since we live in a relatively small town, we occasionally see plate 77. The other day we walked past plate 5. Don’t worry, I have my eyes peeled for the first guy in town who bought a car.

The Trains: I love a culture where only 29% of the people own a car. The trains are frequently packed, but they are on time, they are clean, and they are air conditioned. Also, the different stations play cute little songs, and my kanji is getting better simply by remembering the stations I frequently pass.

The Bikes: I was so excited to get a bike, and I’ll be even more excited when I figure out how to register the damned thing, and am able to ride it places. It’s a nameless silver folding bike, yet unnamed, but it does have the cutest pink u-lock which I couldn’t resist. I loved my bike back home, but I sold it knowing that I would have the pick of the litter here. The cyclists do tend to ride a bot like it’s Thunderdome, weaving in and out of pedestrians with hats pulled down over their eyes, but I’ve learned that it’s safest to hold my gound, and let them manically swerve around me.

Health Insurance: To be honest, this is the real reason I began writing this blog post, as the whole experience of applying for health insurance nearly brought tears to both mine and Jarrett’s eyes.

We began our day by taking a train one stop to Oji, where the city office is located. I tell most people I live in Tokyo, which is true, but not completely. More accurately, the apartment is in the Tokyo Prefecture, in the town of Kita, in the neighborhood of Higashi-jujo. Tokyo is sort of like the county, and Higashi-jujo is basically only my train stop. Kita, however, is the actual city in which we reside, so everything bureaucratic required of the husband and I must be done at the city offices.

The first order of business was to apply for our Alien Residency cards. After walking through the grounds of a beautiful temple, we arrived at the building as directed, then were promptly directed to an adjacent building. Actually, we were physically taken to the second building by an information desk worker, who walked us all the way to the appropriate window. Forms, pictures, passports, yadda-yadda-yadda...about a 35-minute process which resulted in successful registration, though the cards themselves will be available in three weeks. That’s a bit of a bummer, as we can’t get phones or internet service or bank accounts until we have those cards.

Since that whole thing was over with so quickly, we wandered upstairs to fill out the paperwork for NHI—Japanese national health coverage.

Here’s how it went down: first, the obligatory do you speak English? followed by the shaking head, and the obtaining of another employee. We showed them both our passports and our receipts for having just applied for alien residency. We filled out a form with our address, then I signed a form stating that I was the head of the house, and had not worked the previous year in Japan. All of the forms were taken away for a few minutes, entered into computers, then the pair of office workers returned to us with payment slips and two little cards slid into plastic sleeves.

The payment slips were to be expected. It is health insurance, after all, and it isn’t free no matter where you go. We were told to take the payment slips to 7-Eleven each month, pay the balance due, then get them stamped. We were to pay to first slip immediately, preferably before the end of the day. Amount due? About $23.28 American after conversion. That was unexpected.

As for the cards, I asked the English-speaking office worker if these were temporary cards, and if we would be mailed permanent ones. These are your cards, he said. After saying I understood, and that I would be careful with mine, he also helpfully added, Yes. Protect yourself to do that. Beautiful. Oh, and one more thing: total time elapsed between stepping onto the second floor and successfully obtaining health insurance? Less than 20 minutes. It took us longer to take the train one stop back, walk home past the convenience store, and pay for the month.

I have to say, in all honestly, I do not know if I will ever come home.

going home

After packing up the apartment and finally hitting the road, I hoped to feel as if we were on vacation. Jarrett and I had two weeks before our flight left, so we planned a few fun stops on our road trip to California. However, despite the beauty of Crater Lake and the awesomeness of the redwood forests, I still felt as if we were on a deadline.

In California, it was lovely to have a bed again—even if it was an air mattress, it was better than the floor of our old apartment after we sold our bed, and miles above being in a car for hours on end with a bad back. As is our luck, though, Northern California refused to play along with my dreams of sun and sand, and rarely peaked above 80° our whole stay. My swimsuit and goggles remained in my cute pink suitcase, mocking me daily.

The parents house was far more relaxing than the stress of packing, and my mom proved she is the master of the going away party. We said goodbye to my extended family, went to San Francisco a couple times, hung out with a few friends, ate a lot of really good food, had some great nostalgic moments, celebrated our anniversary, and even watched a couple movies for the first time in months. Still, I couldn’t quite relax, as I kept feeling as if there was somewhere I was supposed to be.

It didn’t help that we were constantly busy. Suitcases needed repacked. Boxes needed shipped. Another suitcase needed to be purchased. Other boxes needed emptied and sent to Goodwill. Moving is a long, involved process any time, but an international move begins to feel like a never ending game of Tetris. The next thing I knew, the game was on pause, and we were leaving the next day.

We arrived at SFO almost four hours before our flight. It was either that or risk Monday morning commute traffic with nontransferable, nonrefundable, nonanythingable tickets. Actually, I’m fine with waiting in airports, and am actually quite fond of them. For me, getting ready to travel is all about getting to the airport; it’s all planning and stress and packing beforehand, but the airport is a breath of fresh air between the scheduling and the running amok around foreign lands. After checking in and checking baggage, we hugged the ‘rents goodbye, and made it rather quickly through security.

Aboard our 777, we scored the second best seats in economy class: the second row behind business class. The bathroom was close, but not too close (if you know what I mean); we were among the first in our section to get drinks and food; and, best of all, the third seat in our row was unsold. Unfortunately for me, the daft hippy in the seat in front of me threw his seat all the way back the second he could do so, and proceeded to lie back, sit up, and move about for nearly eleven hours. He was at his bounciest whenever I had a beverage. Also unfortunately, the adorable baby in the next row over divided his time between looking sweet and sitting in a basket while I was awake, and shrieking violently every time I closed an eye. I guess it just wouldn’t be an international flight without the Thunderdome-like aspect of steerage.

Arriving in Japan, it was apparent that Summer had caught up to us. The thin sweater I wore on the plane clung to me immediately upon entering the jetway, and the little people outside were running around, doing their jobs, and sweating furiously. Yet, I refused to be brought down by long flights, stupid rave pants or oppressive humidity. None of these things matter because, at their terminus, I got to pick up my luggage, haul ass through immigration as my dad taught me, and set my eyes on Japan.

It was a long bus ride / subway / train / walk to the new apartment, and we were literally pouring sweat upon arrival, but I finally had the feeling that we had arrived. I finally felt that all the studying and all the applications and all the bureaucracy and all the stress and all the injuries and all the everything was completely worth it when I set my sights upon my new mail box, reached in for my new key, and opened the door to my new home.

Never you mind that it was even small than imagined. Or that we had no power. Or furniture. We were in the cute little town of Kita, minutes from Tokyo, in the Japan I had been working so hard to get back to for the past three years. We were here, we had arrived, we were home.

the new place

I keep getting requests to see pictures of the new apartment, but as I'm fairly forgetful and predominantly lazy, I haven't gotten to it yet. I assume the following are generic pictures of the apartment complex in general, and probably not my particular apartment at all, but they are what I have to go on until we arrive in Japan next month.

The アパート is 20 square meters, which is approximately 215 square feet. It's not a lot of space for one person, let alone two, but the price is only slightly higher than right. After the rental agency accepted our deposit, The Boy and I went promptly to Ikea. We wandered around for a while until we found the smallest example apartment they had—220 square feet. I mentally lobbed off the bathroom, and closed one eye to imagine my new home. It was smaller than my current living room.

However, I look at our new, confined space as an opportunity. For six years the husband and I have lived in our current apartment, slowly bringing things home and socking them away. With my new found ambivalence toward personal items, a tiny apartment seems oddly fulfilling. I needn't concern myself with where to put the myriad possessions I manage yet rarely see or touch, as the two suitcases and two boxes we are taking will be more than enough.

I am also reminded of the time my father-in-law took us to Hawai'i for a week. We all shared a tiny hotel room (which, to be fair, was probably larger than my new apartment will be), which quickly became strewn with clothes and sand, scented with saltwater air and fresh pineapple. I had never been to Hawai'i before, and I haven't been since. It was a beautiful and amazing place, nothing like the rest of the United States, and so much more than I had imagined. It was the same way I felt on my first trip to Japan, and I knew immediately that the hotel room didn't matter, because if I played my cards right, I would hardly be there at all.

So, yeah, my new apartment is going to be the size of some people's back yard sheds. That's all right. Once again, if I have my way, my days will be spent in school, and my evenings spent with my sweetheart, wandering Japan hand-in-hand, taking in everything Tokyo and its surrounding communities have to offer. I will spend my money on a comfortable bed, and I will sleep in my spartan palace, but I will be living somewhere else entirely.

(Also, I think it's adorable.)

five days

The apartment is beginning to empty out, but it is slow and tedious progress. We had a going away party this weekend, followed by an apartment sale. The former only unburdened us of a couple presents for friends we will dearly miss, but the latter had a you-touch-it-you-take-it policy in effect, so I think about half of our crap is gone.

The support of our family and our friends in this time of desperate begging for assistance and shilling of our wares is both awesome and sadly touching. It seems so terrible that our last memories (for the next couple years) of so many people will be loading their cars with our stuff. Still, I am humbled by all the people who have offered to fill boxes or buy things or give me a hug to keep me from climbing the walls.


My back has gotten significantly better, and I have been going on daily walks. I am back to packing boxes (while kneeling on the floor or bending properly!) and loading the car for daily trips to Goodwill. The only problem, and it's sort of a big one, is that I can not sit in one place for more than 20 minutes without stabbing back and hip pain. I avoid the agony by moving as much as possible, but the prospect of a 12+ hour drive to California, followed by a 12+ hour flight to Japan, leaves me worried.

I have a reference for a local chiropractor, and hopefully I can weasel in an appointment before leaving town. Bend me, snap me, slap me, tweak me...whatever it takes to make me right again. If at all possible, I hope to figure out exactly what it is I am doing to myself which has caused the time between attacking spasms to grow ever shorter. I am completely convinced that one of my legs is shorter than the other, but am also fully willing to accept that my atrocious posture is to blame. Whatever the case, I am at my wit's end, and I am desperate for answers.

The next few days are actually fairly low key. Jarrett has school and work all day on both days, so I plan to systematically fill boxes with donate-able items, and drop them off at the Goodwill. There was a point some months ago—and even a few weeks ago—when I had grand ideas about what I wanted to put into storage for the next few years. With only five whole days left in town, I find I have a complete lack of sentimentality. Also, making money off apartment sales is nice, but simply giving things away or strategically abandoning them at intersections is sounding more and more desirable.

As an indicator of both Jarrett's and my obsession with depleting our stock, the most exciting thing that has happened to us in weeks was when we drove past a liquor store and found a six-foot wall of reinforced booze boxes outside for the taking. We gleefully loaded the car, drove home our precious find, and promptly filled them with everything left in our cupboards.

We have no more plates or silverware or cups, and we eat exclusively from bags or boxes.

I feel as if I should be more stressed out than I am. However, after weeks of sickness and pain and worry, I am disturbingly calm. I just keep hearing my dad's words in the back of my head: if it's meant to be, it will all work out. I'm no fatalist and, to be honest, that was one of the platitudes which drove me nuts as a child. As an adult, I find them strangely soothing. Essentially, I can do every single thing which can be done between now and Monday. I will either finish the job or I won't, but either way, I am loading the car with what fits, and I am driving away from Portland no matter what.

I don't need to pull out my hair or cleanse the apartment with fire. I just need to take a deep breath and remember that all my dreams are coming true. I am at the exact point I have been planning for three years. I am (mostly) healthy. I have the best husband in the world, and a truly awesome family. I have great friends, and I am not completely broke. I am moving to Japan. I can honestly say that there is nowhere else I would rather be, nothing else I would rather do, than spend my days helping everything work out.

On a far more positive note than he ever intended, I keep smiling and thinking of the immortal words of George Eastman, "My work is done. Why wait?"

we are official!

After waiting the requisite seven days, Jarrett and I returned to the Japanese Consulate last week to pick up our passports, complete with new student visas. Hooray!

We now have everything in order for the trip to Japan, and we leave the country in three short weeks. We've been packing and craigslisting like crazy, so there isn't much more than that to report. Pack, clean, pack, clean, Goodwill, sleep...

Let it be known, however, that I am not complaining. This is week number three of a mostly screwed-up back, and last week I was sick as a dog, so the fact that I am ambulatory enough to wing crap into boxes, or quietly abandon small household wares in the lobby of the apartment, is good enough for me. I wish I believed in chiropractors, or that any of the medicines I have been prescribed would do anything other than make me sleepy. In the mean time, I pack, then I rest, then I pack, then I take a short walk for exercise.

Onward!

we are eligible!

Yesterday, the husband and I received our certificates of eligibility to enter Japan. Well, first we had to chase down and intercept a UPS van, and then we received said certificates. We were halfway to the Japanese consular offices before I read the fine print, and realized there were still a few more things left to cover.

After picking up a Visa Application to Enter Japan, which is different from the visa application itself, we took yet another set of passport photos, filled out the proper forms, put together all the documentation, and will return to the office later this afternoon. After everything is filed, I am told we should expect a call in 5 to 7 days, asking us to return to the consulate to retrieve our actual visas.

I'm going to be honest with you: I am exhausted. Just when I felt as if I was on a roll, I came down with a stomach bug, and spent the better part of a week either barfing or trying desperately not to heave ho. I began eating solid foods again just a couple days ago, then threw out my back for the fourth time this year. My sleeping schedule is erratic at best these days, and all the tasks I had lined up to finish are literally piled up in my living room awaiting the first day I can lift or bend or move without maximum effort.

I'm holding it together, and I feel myself getting very slowly better. I have decided to make small efforts for the rest of this week. I plan to get at least one thing done each day, in order to keep my motivation high, and possibly two whole things if I can manage it. The husband has been extremely helpful, picking up things from the floor, doing dishes, fetching me juice and apple sauce, and keeping a cool head in spite of all my worry between fits of vomiting.

This weekend, I will be as leisurely as possible. I will try not to worry or force myself to do too much beyond relaxing and getting better. I am fully convinced the only reason I got sick to begin with was because I wore myself down over the past couple weeks. I will be a good Scout, and I will take a break, and I will have a lovely weekend, so I can get back on task bright and early Monday...afternoon.

v i s a s

Yep, it is true...both of our visas have been approved.

It's so very exciting and terrifying at the same time.

major updates

There have been some major shake-ups and advances since I last updated this blog. Seeing as I am nothing if not a first-rate procrastinator, I haven't said very much about most of this to very many people. Well, at the very least, I haven't said much about it on the web.

To begin with, we received our housing assignment a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, the already high price for student housing was nearly doubled by adding a second person. The husband and I would have more space than a single room, but it would be at a price: 650,000¥. That equals almost $7200 for a semester, and it doesn't cover food.

I was extremely appreciative of the fine people who worked to secure us a home, and even managed to wrangle a deal into it (they negotiated a $1000 savings!), but there was no way we could afford that. Literally, it would be a deal breaker. I quickly contacted a few people at the school, all of whom responded quickly and helpfully, and they managed to put me on track to filing a housing waiver and applying for an apartment.

I have yet to hear the final decision on the housing waiver, but we were referred to an awesome rental agency in Tokyo, who managed to put us into an apartment and fax a lease to my school in a matter of days. Don't get me wrong, there were many sleepless nights and fretful emails. However, the leasing agent's multi-lingual staff answered my myriad questions, sent me cute pictures, offered commuting times to campus, set up wire transfers, and handled the business end with my university. It was magical, and I expect someone will be getting the Japanese equivalent of a fruit basket when we arrive!

On the student visa front, our shiny new marriage certificate was received at a rate commensurate with the cost of expressing it there, and promptly sent to Japanese immigration. I have received no official notice that our visas were approved, but I did receive an email yesterday which said that Certificates of Eligibility were beginning to arrive.

We don't actually receive our visas from the school, but are shipped Certificates of Eligibility (COE) after our first semester's payment is processed. When the university gets its money, they will send Jarrett and I the COE, and we will take them to the nearest Japanese embassy. While briefly on foreign soil, we will be issued permission to enter Japan. Just writing that made me excited!

In the mean time, despite nothing official on the visa front, I just received an invoice in my email. I assume this means my visa has processed, though I will verify that tomorrow. I have the unique misfortune of usually receiving emails from TUJ just as they shut down for the day. Also, though no one has said my housing waiver cleared the proper channels, I was told it looked fine before it was submitted, and I was not invoiced for it on my bill. I keep my fingers perpetually crossed.

Now, the fun part: time to come up with the money which isn't covered by financial aid. I was hoping to have received my scholarship by now, but it hasn't come. Sigh. I would be pretty close to the amount I need, but had to decimate our savings for the wire transfer required to secure our apartment. You see how much fun this is? It's a roundy-roundy time.

In the mean time, I'm packing like the dickens. Well, I'm throwing crap away like the dickens, but the important part is how our apartment is very slowly emptying. Anything worth more than $20 is being sold on craigslist, and nearly everyone I meet is solicited with a polite, "Hey, how are you? Lovely to see you! Plasma TV? Bookshelves? Fairly reliable car?" I get the distinct feeling people are going to be glad to see me leave.

Hopefully, I'll have some more news soon. Wish us luck!

Criterion Discs

*If you've sent me money, I've sent your discs (unless you've received an e-mail saying they'll go out soon)*

Asterisk next to re-added movies.

----

I've cleaned up this post some. Here's what's important:

1: Postage is $5 for one disc; $10 for more than one disc. Shipping is expensive.

2: After reserving discs, please contact us within 24 hours or your discs become available again.

3: Please double-check to make sure the disc/s you want is/are available before sending money!

4: Pleas provide information in your comments or e-mails: what discs you want, your name, address if we're shipping, phone # if you're local, etc.

5: I've removed the reserved and sold discs. Some reserved ones may reappear if we don't hear from the person who first asked for them within 24 hours.

6: Leave a comment here or e-mail me at: shmoovio@gmail.com with any further requests for discs. Please be patient!

7: Everything is $10 unless otherwise stated.

8: All discs are in like-new or new-new condition.

Spine #/Title(/Price, if applicable)

2: Seven Samurai
3: The Lady Vanishes
10: Walkabout
22: Summertime
41: Henry V (Olivier)
50: And the Ship Sails On
56: The 39 Steps
75: Chasing Amy
* 82: Hamlet
376: 49th Parallel - $15

kitchen for sale

Jarrett and I spent the weekend cleaning out the kitchen, recycling a bunch of crap, and dropping things off at the Goodwill. I decided to make a list of the few things I have left which somebody might want, and post it here. Clicking any of the pictures should send you to a full-size photo. If you're interested in anything, let me know before I get rid of it elsewhere.

Obviously, this sale only applies to people in Portland. I can't imagine anyone would want to spend up to three times the price to have anything shipped to them. I am driving to California before we fly away, though, so let me know if you're down there, and you want to work anything out.

Very Nice Toaster Oven : $20
This shiny new toaster oven is only a few months old. We bought it to replace a crappy old one, and it has served us well. It is small enough to fit on a counter easily, but deep enough to fit a frozen pizza. Not that we eat those all the time or anything. It bakes, it broils, it toasts. . . and it's a shelf you can set stuff on, so long as you don't mind your stuff getting really hot!

9-Piece 18/10 Stainless + Copper Pan Set : $60
When I graduated from culinary school, my parents bought me a bunch of celebratory kitchen presents. My awesomely crafty mom wrapped all those presents in dish towels and kitchen twine, and they brought them on a road trip to see me. A short time later, the husband and I moved in to our very first apartment without roommates, and those gifts (and towels!) were invaluable. Best of all was this set of well-made pans with copper bottoms. One of my friends mocked me that they were Martha Stewart brand, but they were awesome them, and they remain as awesome now. They are in great condition.

This set comes with an 8-quart stock pot (spaghetti!) and a 10-inch frying pan (rice-a-roni!), as well one lid which fits both of those. There is also a strainer attachment for the big pan, but I never use it because it's dumb. There is also a 2-quart pan (macaroni + cheese!) with a matching lid, a teeny little sauce pan (soup!) with its own lid, and a 6-inch egg pan (eggs?). Original price was $149, but they can be yours for $60. Cause you're pretty.

Calphalon 2.5-quart Saucier with glass lid : $45
Remember all that stuff I said about my Martha Stewart pans? Well, it's true. . . they are nice pans. This pan, however, is lovely. I use it for everything. I don't know how to describe it, but cooks know a good pan the same way they know a good knife: it works beautifully, and it is balanced just so. It cost me eighty bucks, which is why the price is so high. Also, I'm considering bringing it on the voyage. . .

Isi Whipped Cream Canister : $15
Another gift from the thoughtful parental units. Lovingly cared for, in near perfect condition, and all yours for the above bargain basement price for two reasons. One: I have lost a lot of weight, and don't need any help finding it again. Two: it's kinda expensive to buy cream and nitrous cartridges, so you'll need the cash. Plus, they check your ID when you buy nitrous oxide, and look at you like a degenerate.  Be a weirdo noveau chef and make freaky savory foams to gross out your friends! Everyone loves the texture of saliva on their foods! Or, make yummy delicious whipped cream like a normal. The choice is yours.

Pretty, Dainty Cheese Plate : $5
Honestly, I was going to give this to the Goodwill, but figured someone might like it. It's really quite pretty, and my crappy picture doesn't do it justice. The base is about 8 inches across, and it's quite sturdy. The dome is blown glass, and it freaks my klutzy ass out every time I touch it. I like to put mini pies on it, then gaze at them lovingly. I wonder how it was that I ended up so fat. . . ?

Sharp Half Pint Microwave : $40
This little sucker is a cutey. I bought it because, clearly, I was on a blue kick at the time, and it's so damned adorable. It's basically a 12(ish)-inch cube, so it takes up very little space. It has a carousel inside, as all good microwaves do, and it rotates your food like a miniscule champ. Its only drawback is that it can't microwave big things. Then again, if you need more than four burritos in one sitting, your problem goes beyond microwave capacities.

Sno-Cone Machine + Extras : $5
I didn't buy this because it was blue. That was the only color they had. I bought it because I was hot and I wanted a freaking sno-cone. And now you can have it for the same reason. You don't even need to freeze special trays—just dump in some ice cubes. Plus, I found some sugarfree syrup packets and some cute sno-cone cups and straws in the cupboard when I dug this out, and you can have those too. Now, if only it was sunny outside.

Rival 4-quart Crock Pot : $10
This thing is in excellent condition, and I have used it religiously. Beef burgundy, Japanese curry, Kalua pig. . . oh, the memories that Crocky and I have. Wouldn't you like slow-cooked memories of your own? I'm also throwing in a weird insert I bought from the crock pot company, which allows you to bake cakes in it. You know, if that's the kind of thing you're into. I haven't actually done that, but it seemed like a kitschy funny idea. Take it away!

Kitchen Aid 7-cup Food Processor : $40
This little sucker was over a hundred bucks, but I just need to get it out of here. You're welcome to pay me more, if you're so inclined, but I won't twist your arm. That would be bizarre and mean of me. Comes with the regular attachment, a grater attachment, and an attached cord! I joke, but it's awesome. It's smaller than the behemoth food processors out there, but more powerful than one of those stupid mini prep things, which you think are going to be helpful, but really just piss you off, and leave you smashing up your stuff in tiny batches. It is actually the perfect size for small home lifestyles. Sadly, I am moving into a closet, and taking a pillow instead.

Sunbeam Bread Machine : $15
I will not shit you. . . there are much better bread machines out there. If you want a crazy awesome bread machine, then be my guest, and spend your yen on one of those. If I had the space or the money, I certainly would. However, if you just want occasional homemade bread, made perfectly fine, and available in two sizes, then look no further. This little guy is in good shape, and even has the original manual (ooooh!). Also, if you would like to buy a bread machine without taking out a second mortgage, this is just right. It's fairly big, though, so make sure you have room for the sucker first. I won't answer the door when you come knocking, crying that it's heavy.

Eight Little Jam Jars : $5
These cute little German or Swiss or Swedish or Whatever jars are built for homemade jams or jellies. I use them for little custards, because they're cute, I'm full of whimsy, and it cracks me up. I also made yogurt in them once or twice, and for your ten bux, I will tell you how I did so! You can use them for anything you see fit. They come with rubber seals and little metal clasps.

Unremarkable Little Rice Cooker : $5
Cooks rice, and steams veggies in the included attachment. Not fancy, not exciting. Fill with food and water, press down the switch, wait for your food. It does make a satisfying thud when the food is done. Whee!

Once again, there are many better [rice cookers] out there, but you can't beat this price. A rice cooker is not really a necessity, not even where I'm going, but if you wants it, it's yours! Don't make the poor little guy go into the Goodwill box! Take him home, glue on some googly eyes, and tell him your secrets!

Matfer Mandoline : $40
We call this guy Bitey. It is super sharp, and does exactly what it's supposed to do. If you are in a hurry, and you forget to use the guard while slicing onions for French Onion soup, it will do exactly as it was made to. If you store it wrong-side-up in the cupboard, it will do exactly as it was designed to. Comes with three blades, and a guard to protect whatever fingers you have left after remembering there is a guard. I will also throw in some band-aids, because you will be needing them. It's a lovely piece of equipment, despite the horror it has inflicted upon me, and you are more than welcome to purchase it at this more than half-off price, then write me in Japan, so that we may swap war stories.

Espresso Machine and Extras : $40
One mini espresso machine, which works by pouring water into a tank, then waiting for it to heat up. It's not a long wait, but I thought you'd like to know. Comes with a wand for lattes, and a glass decanter for said espresso. I don't know why we bought this, as even cheap espresso machines are crazy expensive, but we wanted one, and now we have to get rid of it. To make you feel better about your 40 bones, I'm throwing in a stainless steel milk-foaming thingy with an attached thermometer, a pretty canister for coffee, a shaker for cocoa or cinnamon or whatever, and two nice, big mugs. Doesn't that make you feel warm inside?

Ikea Spice Rack, Hardware & Jars : $20
I like spices, but I really love spice racks, so I shelled out the monies for this nice set-up only a few months ago. It has a pole, which hangs on the wall, two racks which hold 15 spice jars in total, and a couple clips for towels or whatever. Let me know if you want all my spices, too (free!), or I'll just run all the glass jars through the dishwasher for you.

yay!! f u c k

I just opened an email from Temple, the subject of which was student visa. I hoped the email would tell me I was approved, and I would be sleeping well from here on out. At the very least, I figured the email would tell me the application was being processed, and a rough date at which I could expect an answer.

Nope.

We just received a phone call from Japanese Immigration, who are currently reviewing your COE applications for you and your husband. They informed us that they cannot accept the marriage certificate you submitted because it is too old. They requested that we ask you to re-submit a more recent, original (not a copy) marriage certificate (issued within the last 3 months).

Okay, I have seriously jumped through a number of hoops thus far, most of which are related to being a married student who doesn't want to leave her husband for the next few years, and I have done so without (too much) complaint. This, however, is ridiculous. Actually, this exceeds ridiculousness, and borders on a heretofore unknown variety of ridiculosity.

Jarrett and I paid for and received a copy of our marriage certificate back in 2004, after it was officially filed and recognized. I didn't imagine I'd need it for anything, but I have kept it on hand all this time. When I was asked to send in a copy of said certificate, I simply reached for the official copy I had been holding onto—stamped, signed and notarized by Multnomah County—and sent it in.

I understand it isn't a recent copy, however it is still valid. Furthermore, even if Jarrett and I were no longer married (and we wanted for some unknown reason to move to another country together), we could still march down to the county records office and get a shiny new copy of our marriage certificate. Obviously, that is not the case, but it does point to the silliness of the whole endeavor.

Deep breath in. Hold. Deep breath out.

I will do, as always, as I am told. I will sleep poorly tonight, I will wake up early tomorrow, I will navigate morning traffic and parking, and I will secure a shiny new copy of the same old marriage certificate. And I will pay something like twenty-fracking-dollars for the pleasure of doing so. Then I will spend gawd-knows-how-much fed-exing it to Tokyo.

Sigh.

scholarship is go!

After receiving my official scholarship forms in the mail on Friday, I put them in my purse, and promptly forgot about them. Not that it would have done me much good to remember them over the three-day weekend, but I did have a bit of a jumpy holycrap! moment when I suddenly remembered I had yet to fill them out and return them.

Done and done.

At some point in the unspecified future, I will receive a check in the mail, and I will do a little dance. A four-thousand-dollar dance.

woo-hoo!

Hooray! I just received this email:


Dear Angela:

Congratulations! I am pleased to inform you that you have been selected to receive one of the Bridging Scholarships for Study Abroad in Japan in 2010-2011. The Selection Committee members read and evaluated more than 500 applications for the 80 scholarships that have been awarded, and were impressed with the quality of your application and your enthusiasm about studying in Japan. You can justly be proud of your achievement.

A letter is on its way to you by post that contains some more information about the scholarship. In the same envelope is an information and acceptance form that we ask you to complete and return to us by mail or fax by June 12, 2010. It asks you to formally accept the Bridging Scholarship, and to provide some more information on your program in Japan. We also ask for addresses and contact numbers that will be reliable until the time of your departure for Japan, so that we will be able to send you the check for your scholarship stipend; we especially want to confirm your e-mail address, as that will be the quickest and easiest way to contact you.

If you do not receive the letter in the mail by June 3, could you please let me know via e-mail?

Thanks very much. I look forward to corresponding with you further during the summer.


Susan Schmidt, Executive Director
Bridging Project for Study Abroad in Japan
Association of Teachers of Japanese
240 Humanities, UCB 279
University of Colorado, Boulder, CO 80309

one week

It occurred to me today, while I was standing in line at the cafeteria, that all the student visa applications will be filed by Temple on June 1. That's only seven days away. I don't know how much longer it will take for approval, but I'm getting really anxious.

As soon as our visas are approved, Temple will invoice me for the balance due (not covered by financial aid, of course), and the only thing standing betweeen me and Japan is a tiny apartment filled to the brim with crap. I'm so excited!!

As a matter of fact, I'm so excited that I'm not even worrying about the apartment chaos. I am moving to Japan. I am moving to Japan. I am moving to Japan, and I'm taking my sweetheart with me, and it is going to be the adventure of a lifetime. I really am so very excited, and I can't stop thinking about it.

Keep yr fingers crossed.

on a completely unrelated note

This is Lonewolf. I buried him here in Portland seven years ago this month. I knew that by doing so, I was cementing myself—and all our intertwined memories—in this town I moved to expressly to be in love with him.

My dream of moving to Japan grew slowly. When it finally materialized, it was such a distant hope that I didn't really even dare assume its reality. Now, the time is upon us, and I have to leave behind this town and these memories and that body I put into the ground.


I guess you could say I'm having a hard time with that.

I am not second guessing myself, and I'm not backing out of my plans for the future. I'm just finding it more painful than I expected to walk away from the past.

2010 was the first year I did not set aside the anniversary of that fateful day in May when I learned what happens when life comes to a grinding halt. I made plans, and I intentionally went about my day like it was any other. Granted, by the time it was over, I was laying on a table in a doctor's office, moaning about back pain and begging for prescriptions. But I decided it would be best if I celebrated him by letting this one thing go, and I guess it didn't turn out that well. Not that my back pain and my memories are completely related.

Another thing I promised myself after Lonewolf died was to always remember this: I am still alive. As painful as that may seem at any given time, I refused to allow myself to wallow in that sadness. Because the pain and sadness of believing you will be better soon, checking into the hospital with hope, then dying suddenly, gasping for air...that pain certainly far exceeded anything I have yet felt. His pain was worse. His dying was worst. I just have to keep going.

I bring all this up now because, seven years later, it can still hit me like a ton of bricks. I go longer stretches without the crippling sadness, but when it reappears, it feels almost like it did that first night. Almost, but (honestly) not quite.

And now I'm leaving. I'm packing up, and moving away, and I'm leaving him behind. I still have his letters and his things; I still have my tattoos and my pictures. But I'm leaving him behind, and I'm finding it hard to forgive myself for that.

I'll let go. I'll walk through the cemetery and I'll take one more picture of his grave, and then I'll get in the car, and I'll drive away. And I suppose that if that doesn't kill me, then I don't know what will.

not even close

I said to my Japanese teacher today that, what with getting plane tickets and having received my financial aid award letter, my last major hurdle is getting my visa. And that's...mostly true.

Don't get me wrong. I still spend the majority of my time worrying how long it will take, why isn't it here, why isn't it here, why isn't it here?! My contact at TUJ (who answers my many frequent, paranoid questions) seemed to imply it's simply a matter of course at this point. Being the person I am, though, I refuse to get ahead of myself. I refuse to accept anything as a done deal until the evidence is in my hot little hands.

In the mean time, looking around the apartment, I have to admit the biggest hurdle is probably the insurmountable heap of shit before me. Jarrett and I have lived in this apartment for longer than we have been married, and we're edging six years. That is, honestly, the longest I have continuously lived anywhere in my entire life. We haven't done too badly, what with this only being a one-bedroom, but there is a reason I affectionately refer to our cozy nest as The Shitpit.

There is a lot to do. There are at least three or four lots to do. And here's the rub: what with needing money for this big hullabaloo, we keep picking up extra shifts at work. Any time not spent shoveling popcorn, baking bagels, studying Japanese, sweeping floors or eating is predominantly spent sleeping. Craigslisting has sort of fell by the wayside. Now, with the quiet clicking into place of puzzle pieces, I am half tempted to simply sell the most valuable stuff first, beginning at the top of the list, and simply close the apartment door and walk away at the end of July.

If you know me, you know I'm kidding.

If I learned anything from my Mom, it was how to clean up after myself. Then again, my mom has a bit of a sneaky side. Let's just call it a sparkle in the eye of a woman who probably hasn't told me all of her really good stories yet! Maybe I will, maybe I won't. I probably won't.

But a girl can dream.

one more hurdle

As predicted, my financial aid award letter was pretty close to exactly what I thought it would be. As usual, there was a whole lot of panicking before needed. If I didn't now have to drain my savings account to come up with the $3200 I am short, I would see a doctor for a prescription of sedatives!

One small quirk: my letter stated that my award was based upon my plans to live off-campus. I would love to have a cute little studio of my own somewhere outside of Tokyo, however, my first semester will be spent in TUJ housing. Technically, all their housing is off-campus, as it would be prohibitively expensive to build dorms in Ginza, but I'm now awaiting an email response to find out if that's a clerical error.

Wouldn't it be sweet if I got a little extra money?

Yeah, I won't hold my breath.

yipes!

Just got my Temple financial aid package in the mail on my way out the door. In class now; more later.

the whole enchilada

Wandering around the TUJ website, I found the page which displays the actual cost of attendance. I have seen this page before, but not since I applied this Winter. Here are the facts, ma'am:

So, what's interesting are two things which aren't accounted for on this list. Namely, the application fee of 10,000¥ (about $109.00) and the admission fee of 35,000¥ (roughly $379.00). I already paid the application fee, but not the admission fee. I also paid for Jarrett's visa application (20,000¥ = $217.00), but not my own. Anyway, the total should equal the contents of the above list (1,582,450¥) plus the unmentioned admission fee (35,000¥) for a grand total of 1,617,450¥ or . . . $17,495.00~ish.

I suppose this teaches me not to freak out before all the evidence is in. Last year, I received just under $14,000 in financial aid. If I get about the same for my first year at Temple, then I'm only down roughly $3500 dollars. Don't get me wrong—that's a lot of money. That's more money than I have ever saved in my entire life. However, it isn't completely out of the question. Had it greatly exceeded $5000, then I'd be delaying my admission for a while.

My only real problem is this: of all the money I received last year in financial aid, only a fraction of it went directly to tuition. Most of it paid for books and supplies and food and rent when I couldn't work full time because I was busy going to school full time. Luckily, the above list accounts for rent, as my first term at TUJ will be in school housing. It does not, however, account for food or books or supplies. Since I'm waffling back and forth between positives and negatives, I should also mention another good thing: the admission fee (35,000¥) and the matriculation fee (415,000¥) are one-time fees. I will need to apply for a visa every year, but without those other two fees, the cost each year will be about $5000 less.

I applied for a Temple scholarship, but did not receive it. I also applied for an independent scholarship of $4000, and I expect to receive the verdict some time in June. I've got my fingers crossed, but a number of people are up for the same monies, so I'm not holding my breath. I can also reapply for different Temple scholarships next year, and I'm hopeful that I'll get one eventually. Hopefully.

I have already resigned myself to the fact that the first semester—maybe even the first year—in Japan will be difficult. I long ago decided, though, that is a hardship I am willing to bear. This is my lifelong dream, and I'm not jumping into it unprepared. I accept these difficulties as part of a package with greater benefits.

Besides. . . I'm a student. I'm used to being poor. And I'm moving to the place which invented instant ramen.

w.t.f.

As I think I mentioned before, I received an email last week from Temple's IT department, giving me access to their online services. Of course, the first thing I did was to check my financial aid status online. Then my jaw dropped. I had been awarded the Pell grant for two semesters, totaling about $4500. That was pretty awesome. However, there was no note of anything else. No loans, subsidized or otherwise, showed up on my account.

Now, it's very possible the loan paperwork hasn't even gone through yet. I do still have to finish this semester and Summer term. That's not only possible, it's highly likely. However, I am a professional worrier, so I fired off an email to the bursar's office asking for answers. From there, I was directed to Financial Services at the main campus. No answer. I finally hunted down the email address for Financial Services at the Japan campus (neither email address is easy to find on the website), then I emailed them, too. No reply.

I'm not even looking for a definitive answer here; a simple "we don't know yet" will suffice to keep me from worrying for another week or two. The complete lack of a response, however, was beyond freaking me out. I finally ended up emailing my contact in the Office of Student Services. He has nothing to do with financial aid, but has thus far done a great job getting answers to my inane questions, so I hoped he would have better luck than I have with these questions. Sure enough, I received an answer a day later:

Regarding financial aid: I will get an estimate of your financial aid eligibility based on your 2010-2011 FAFSA from Student Financial Services (SFS) in Temple main campus before June 1. I will inform you of this amount, and it will be automatically deducted from your advance payment.

Okay. Whew. That's one load off my mind, but now there's another. I was aware that the tuition had to be paid in full before they would issue my visa (weird, but okay...), and I wasn't too concerned, as my financial aid usually covers everrything. Then I read this:

Actual financial aid will be determined after you arrive at TUJ, register for classes and complete your Master Promissory Note & Entrance Interview online.

Federal financial aid alone is generally not enough to cover the entire advance payment unfortunately. If you are relying solely on financial aid for this, then I recommend you look for an alternative private loan.

Seriously? Why not? This is not only strange, but completely unacceptable. It's like saying, "We won't give you a visa to enter Japan until you pay in advance. To pay in advance, you can use financial aid, but we can't tell you how much you are awarded until you get to Japan. To enter Japan..."

If it's only a matter of a few hundred dollars, that's not too big of a deal. If it's only a couple thousand dollars, i might be able to swing that, too. But what if it's more than that? This is really only the latest in a long string of strange behavior from this place. I just sent them 20,000¥ for Jarrett's visa application (about $240) and previously sent 10,000¥ for the application to attend. Then I found out I still owe 52,000¥ (almost $570 -- 20,000¥ for my visa application and an additional 32,000¥ for the application to attend). Jesus, Mary and Joseph! I understand the separate fees to apply for a foreign visa, but over 400 bucks just to apply? I really should have read the fine print. Ivy League schools don't charge that much!

Yeah, so, uhm...I guess I just need to be positive. I need to wait and see how all this pans out. Many other aspects of this process, which seemed tragic at the time, have turned around in my favor. I need to keep reminding myself of that. I'm trying, I really am. I know I need to try harder.

I'm also going to need one kick-ass garage sale.

welcome to 1996

After mailing my visa application today, I returned home to find an email which linked to Temple University's online services. Ah, yes, I thought. I will use this to sign up for classes and check my financial aid status, and all the what-haves-you of student life.

Well, I will, after I get used to it's convoluted and ugly nature. All school websites I've been required to use over the years have varied from nominally ugly to ridiculously difficult; this one is low on the spectrum of offensiveness, but still looks like something straight out of geocities.

Yikes.

done and done

The parcel is in the post!

at long last

I received the call from my Mom and Dad yesterday, which informed me that The Papers are on their way. For the past month, we have been waiting for banking information to arrive from Japan, and it finally disembarked the slow boat to California. With no further ado, I may officially submit my application for a Japanese visa.

Japanese banks are a thing which would send any red-blooded American screaming for the hills. Additionally, every fee and inconvenience an American bank levies upon its customers (which are ridiculous by all standards) pales in comparison to the rigamaroll and hoops which must be jumped through in the Land of the Rising Sun. However, despite their bizarre hours and bizarre-er fees (all ATM transactions garner a fee; weekend ATM usage costs more!), the quaintness and the respectful business style of a Japanese bank is still preferable to dealing with the riff-raff at your average American bank.

On his last visit home to Japan, my father set in motion the process of retrieving copies of bank statements for my visa application. To begin with, he called his Japanese bank and requested an appointment. A few days later, at his scheduled time, he went to said bank, took a number, and sat down. All of this may seem archaic in a country where we pop by the ATM a few times a week, or use our cards a few times a day; however, Japan is still a cash-based economy, and most people go to their bank closer to once a month. When it was his turn, my dad was given the undivided attention of an actual banker, who sat with him, discussed his needs, and the best way to accomplish them.

It will take some getting used to when I arrive in the country, but Japan's banking style reminds me sweetly of my maternal grandfather, who worked for the now defunct Bank Cal: he took the bus to work each day in a suit and tie, and he took his duties very seriously. It hearkens back to a bygone era when banking was a real business, not the flim-flam it is today, entirely set-up with the goal of bilking its customers. Once I move to Japan, I have great plans for getting dressed up at the beginning of each month, taking the train to my new bank, and doing my business in town like the good old days.

Out of my imagination and back into the land of reality, my dad settled his business in Japan, came home to the Americas, and waited. When the Japanese bank finished the requisite paperwork and fulfilled his requests, the information was sent to his family home in Japan. When it arrived, it was put into a new envelope and forwarded to the U.S., just over one month later.

That is where we are now.

I'm taking this moment to update the blog because—despite the stress of knowing I must send in my visa application and about 12 more pounds of paperwork—filling all this stuff out and comprehending how long it will take if anything is forgotten or mistaken is even more stressful. So, I suppose I am procrastinating. Then again, I haven't made a blog post in a while, so let us not say Scout is shirking her duties, but simply getting to them in a more roundabout sort of way.

In the mean time, I await my envelope from California. When that arrives in a few days, I will attach the banking info to Jarrett's and my visa applications, send it to Japan, and await the decision with baited breath.

what the everloving fuck? crisis averted

We all remember that post I made, where I responded to Temple's request for more information, right? I'm pretty sure it didn't just happen in my head. As a matter of fact, I have the copies of the forms Temple sent me, annotated with the note:

• received 3/26
• copied 1040, W2s; sent out 3/27

right here in front of me while I patiently wait on hold, listening to classical music by some Philadelphia orchestra, what will be playing at the Verizon Center next month. As I wait here, impatiently humming, I'm staring at the letter I received from Temple yesterday, which is decidedly not my financial aid award letter, also which I desperately need to complete my visa application.

Nope. This letter begins, "On 03/18/2010 we requested that you forward documents to us..."

What the fuck? So I just mailed off my financial and tax information to some sort of Pennsylvania abyss? Seriously, the campus in Japan seems to get my correspondence just fine, and usually in record time. What on Earth is going on between here and the next three time zones? Also, manalive it's weird sending information to and technically attending school in a state I've never even visited.

Don't get me wrong: I've considered going to Philly. History and heart of the early nation and all that (also: I've secretly been wanting a Temple t-shirt, but I refuse to jinx myself by ordering one until my visa comes through). I even considered taking a brief road trip there and to D.C. before expatriating, but—even more than not having the money—I don't have the time.

Hold, hold, hold, hold, hold, hol...

"Hi, I'm a recently admitted student, and..."
"I.D. number?"
"I believe it's 91X XXX XXX, and my name is Ang..."
"How can I help you?"

blah blah blah, sent you these documents, blah blah blah Pennsylvanian Abyss, blah blah blah WTH...

(I use heck here, but not on the phone, because my mama didn't raise no dummy, and despite the fact that I am exasperated [and once again sleeping less and less each day] I always speak cordially with people who can erase all my valid information with a couple of keystrokes. I also take notes, record dates, and ask for names)

...blah blah blah I was hoping you could tell me what's going on?

"We have all your information."
 "Everythin...?"
"Yes, we have everything. "
"Really?! But I just got this letter, and..."
"We have everything. Thank you for call..."
"Wait! When perchance will you be sending a letter to that effect?"
"Probably next week."
"Next week?"
"Probably."
"Awesome. Great. Thanks so much. Oh, and can I get your name?"

hello again

No, I have not disappeared off the face of the Earth. I went back to school last week, signed up for a few extra shifts at work, and promptly threw out my back. Just when I thought I was on the mend, I awoke to worse pain, and have been pretty much lying around flat on my back ever since. I wish I could enjoy the position, but as a consummate worrier, I pretty much lie there thinking of all the stuff I could be doing.

I think I may actually be getting better this time. It'll probably still destroy my weekend, but—fingers crossed—that will be the end of it. I did manage to get a swim in on Tuesday (before the worst of it hit), and I hope that when I can begin exercising again, it will help strengthen those dreaded back muscles.

Until then, I'll just keep watching the ceiling and picturing images in the beautiful, beautiful asbestos.

pay me, pal

After much pathetic struggling, I finally figured out how to add a PayPal button to the blog. It's over there! --------------->

If you ordered DVDs, I'll let you know the final cost (including nominal shipping fees), and you may click there to deposit the monies. I will send your package (hee hee!) when I receive confirmation. Yay! If Scout made other arrangements with you, simply ignore this post and go about your business.

Have a lovely day!

finally, here is a list of some of those DVDs you jackals want a crack at

Unless otherwise noted, all discs are $5 each. Let us know if you want to buy anything. Make us an offer if you want a bunch o' discs.

(500) Days Of Summer
2 Seconds
3 Days Of The Condor
10 Things I Hate About You
24 Hour Party People
25th Hour
The Abyss (Special Edition)
All About My Mother
Almost Famous
Amadeus
Amadeus (Director's Cut)
Amelie
American Flyers
Anywhere But Here
Arsenic And Old Lace
Astrospies
Badlands
Barcelona
The Battleship Potemkin
Beautiful Girls
Being John Malkovich
The Bicycle Thief
The Big Sleep
Billy Elliot
The Bird With The Crystal Plumage (no case)
Black Hawk Down
Blazing Saddles
Blood Diamond
Blood Simple
Boa VS. Python (sorry, Doug)
Bonnie And Clyde
Boogie Nights
Bounce
Boys Don't Cry
Bridget Jones's Diary
Bringing Up Baby
Buster Keaton: The Great Stone Face Of Comedy
Caddyshack
Catch Me If You Can
The Cell
Center Stage
Clockwatchers
Contact
The Conversation
The Count of Monte Christo (based on the life of the Earl of Sandwich)
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Cruel Intentions
Crumb
Dancer In The Dark
Days Of Heaven
Desperado
Doctor Zhivago
Dr. Strangelove, etc.
Dogma (Special Edition)
Double Indemnity
Eddie Izzard: Unrepeatable
Elizabeth
El Mariachi
Ever After
An Evening With Kevin Smith
E.T. (2 Disc Limited Collector's Edition) - Box - $10
Femme Fatale
Fight Club
Finding Forrester
Finding Nemo
The Five Pennies
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Here To Eternity
Funny Face
Funny People
Ghost Dog
Ghost In The Shell
Ghost World
Go
The Godfather (DVD Collection: The Godfather I, II, III and Bonus Materials) - Box - $10
Goodfellas
Good Night And Good Luck - unopened
Good Will Hunting - Canadian version, not the movie-only US one
The Great Dictator
Greg The Bunny: The Complete Series
Groundhog Day
Grosse Pointe Blank
Hamlet
Happiness
Hard Eight
Harold & Maude
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
Hedwig And The Angry Inch
High Fidelity
The Hire
House Of Games
Igby Goes Down
In Her Shoes
In The Company Of Men
The Insider
The Italian Job
Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back
Jim Gaffigan: Beyond The Pale
Juno (Digital Special Edition w/ Script)
Killer's Kiss
The Killing
Killing Zoe
Kingpin
Kissing Jessica Stein
Knocked Up
L.A. Story
The Last Emperor
Léon The Professional
Let The Right One In
Life Is Beautiful
Life Of Brian
Limbo
The Lion In Winter
The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings (Special Extended DVD Edition) - Box - $10
The Lord Of The Rings: TFotR (non-box extended version)
Lost In Translation
The Lumiére Brothers' First Films - $110
Macbeth (Jarrett's ancestor!) (Polanski's version!) - $10
Magnolia
Maid In Manhattan
A Man For All Seasons
The Manchurian Candidate
The Manhattan Project
The Mask Of Zorro
Mean Girls
The Meaning Of Life
Meeting People Is Easy: A Film About Radiohead
Metropolis
Michael Clayton
Miller's Crossing
Minority Report
Monsters, Inc.
Monty Python And The Holy Grail
Moulin Rouge
Mrs. Dalloway
Mulan
Mulholland Drive
Nosferatu, The Vampyre
Ocean's Eleven
On The Beach
Once Upon A Time In Mexico
Out Of Sight
Paths Of Glory
Pecker
The Philadelphia Story
Pi
The Piano
The Pink Panther (1963)
Platoon - unopened
The Player
Pleasantville
Pretty In Pink
The Producers
The Professionals
Proof
Pulp Fiction
The Purple Rose Of Cairo
Radio Days
Raging Bull
Random Hearts
Ratatouille
The Red Violin
Requiem For A Dream
Reservoir Dogs (Mr. Pink Edition)
Return To Me
A Room With A View - $10, unopened
Run Lola Run
Running On Empty
Save The Last Dance
Seconds
Shakespeare In Love
A Shot In The Dark
Se7en
Sliding Doors
Some Kind Of Wonderful
The Spanish Prisoner
Spartan
Sports Night (The Complete Series) - $15
The Sum Of All Fears
Superbad
Taxi Driver
Tenacious D: The Complete Masterworks
The Thin Red Line
This Is Spinal Tap (packed but pointless non-Criterion re-release)
Three Kings
Titus
To The Moon
Trainspotting
The Trials Of J. Robert Oppenheimer
Twelve O'Clock High
Twilight
Twin Peaks: The First Season (Special Edition)
Two Weeks Notice
Unbreakable
Under The Cherry Moon
Upright Citizens Brigade: The Complete First Season - $10
Vampyr
Velvet Goldmine
The Virgin Suicides
A Walk To Remember
War Games
Way Of The Gun
Welcome To The Dollhouse
Woman In The Dunes
Wonder Boys
Yellow Submarine
Your Friends And Neighbors
Zero Effect

slow day, take it easy

As Spring break winds down as quickly as it began, I like to think I've made some progress toward the move to Japan. I spent the morning at my mostly deserted school, dropping off forms, picking up books, paying for little things, and generally wishing I didn't have to attend school this term. I know there is still so much to do, and I wish I had the next five months to dedicate solely to packing, selling and worrying, but (as of right now) I feel good about where I am.

I got copies of my most recent transcripts today—including Winter term, which I just discovered I aced!—to attach to a scholarship application for study in Japan. I applied for a school-based scholarship, which I felt really good about, only to be informed that I didn't win anything. I'm still keeping my fingers crossed for this second scholarship, but I ain't putting all my eggs in that $4000 basket. I shall remain cautiously hopeful.

I'm still pulling together all the papers I need to apply for Jarrett's and my visas, and though that does remain my number one priority and stress center, I have until June 1 to post it to Japan, so I am attempting to chillax on that one aspect. I do need to get an official copy of our marriage certificate (to prove we aren't just cohabitating sinners I suppose) to attach to said forms, which shouldn't be a problem at all. I also need paperwork for my financial aid info, but I haven't even received that yet myself, so I'm at a loss as to how they expect me to send it. I also changed my schools from PCC to Temple in my online FAFSA, and listed myself as a sophomore, making me eligible for a wee bit more money. w00t!

Pardon me while I continue the 21st century version of muttering out loud to myself. . .

My other big concern in buying tickets to Japan. I found tickets at priceline for as low as $664 per person, one way, but my Dad told me to hold off on tickets. He has his own travel agent, since he spends almost as much time in the air as he does on the ground, and thinks I may be able to swing a better deal by picking up tickets which the agent purchases in bulk. I hope so, as a couple hundred bucks in cash, rather than in William Shatner's grubby little hands, could go a short but helpful distance in The Most Expensive City In The World.

This brings us 'round to Scout's final concern of the day: housing. I need to fill out, then fax or mail, housing forms for both Jarrett and I. As I previously posted, I am hoping to score on campus housing in Japan for the first term. It has recently occurred to me, though, that by asking Jarrett to fill out a form for housing, we may be signing up to pay twice the ¥420,000 fee. Yikes. We'll see. So long as I don't show up at the airport with nowhere to stay, I don't care where I end up! Well, I do care not to go broke simply putting a roof over our heads.

All of this is a roundabout way of saying I am done with errands for the day, and quite possibly the week. I know my final term of school here in the Americas is going to be hard enough without piling the myriad tasks I have yet to accomplish on top of it, so I'm going to attempt relaxation this last weekend of vacation. Attempt. Attempt. Relaxation. Yeah, I can already feel the soothing effects of constant worry.